Defending the Worst

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The Sun-Sentinel.com has posted their list of the 100 Worst Movies. While I would agree with many of their choices, there were ten that I thought good enough to avoid the dubious honor:Soylent Green: Sure, it looks dated now, but as a 14 year old watching it for the first time on the big screen, it was cool. Plus there’s that great fight scene between Charlton Heston and Chuck [The Rifleman] Connors… and Edward G. Robinson in his final performance. Who can forget the classic line yelled by Heston: “Soylent Green is ….” [No, I’m not giving it away.]

Last Action Hero: I’ve never understood the backlash against this one. Sure, it’s no classic, but it’s also not as bad as some folks claim. I enjoyed the conceit of the movie: Arnold is a movie action hero brought to life. We get to see the clichés of action films played against a “real world” setting. Maybe people didn’t want that wall broken down. I don’t know, but I can tell you that I thought “Last Action Hero” was fun.

The Island of Dr. Moreau: Val Kilmer and Marlon Brando. That alone should be worth the price of admission… especially with some of the choices that Brando made for the film. It’s no classic, but it sure doesn’t belong on the worst films list.

Rhinestone: Sly Stallone, Dolly Parton and country music. Okay, I’ll admit I am a bit biased towards Stallone films. [You’d have never guessed, right?] “Rhinestone” is not one of Sly’s best, but it does have some fun moments… enough to at least keep it off the worst movies of all time list.

Maverick: How in the world could James Garner returning as Daddy Maverick and teamed with director, Richard Donner plus stars Mel Gibson and Jodie Foster make this worst movies list? Just watching for all the appearances by Graham Greene, Alfred Molina, James Coburn, Geoffrey Lewis, Paul Smith, Dan Hedaya, Denver Pyle, Clint Black, Art LaFleur, Corey Feldman, Waylon Jennings, Vince Gill, William Smith, Doug McClure, Henry Darrow, James Drury, Danny Glover, Margot Kidder, Reba McEntire and so many more makes it enough fun to keep it off the list.

Waterworld: This is one of those movies doomed from the start due to negative publicity. Costner and director Kevin Reynolds had problems and Costner ended up taking the reins. The movie went way over budget. When it finally opened the buzz was bad. “Waterworld” is not a classic, but it is a fun way to spend a couple of hours. Although not based on a comic book, it has a comic book feel. And I mean that in a good way.

The Godfather Part III: How could any movie live up to “The Godfather” and “The Godfather, Part II”? Sure, “Godfather III” has it’s problems, but it’s another movie that I think got a far worse backlash than it deserved. Poor Sofia Coppola got hammered by the press. So too, did her dad for hiring her. Then Robert Duvall wasn’t brought back because he was asking for too much money? Pay the man! He’s worth it. Still, even with it’s flaws, it has enough going for it to make it worthwhile. Hold it up to “The Godfather” parts one and two and it falls way short, hold it up to 90% of the movies on this list and it towers above them.

Plan 9 from Outer Space: There’s no way I can argue that this is a great movie. It’s bad, bad, bad. Terrible dialogue, cheap beyond cheap sets, a stupid plot, burning paper plates as fly saucers, a hokey prologue by Criswell the psychic, Bela Lugosi in his last role [he died during filming and was replaced by a taller man who was a dentist by trade] and so much more just make this thing a complete mess. A mess you can’t take your eyes off. A mess that bears repeated viewings. A mess that entertains. And that’s enough to keep it off the list.

Over the Top: Like “Waterworld”, “Over the Top” was doomed before it opened. Stallone’s salary got more publicity than the film itself since it made him the highest paid actor in Hollywood. That coupled with the fact that his character would arm-wrestle his way back into his son’s life kept audiences away. If you can get past the basic premise that Stallone is a truck driving arm wrestler trying to win back his son’s affection from a rich grandfather who has lied about him… wait, now as I type this, I’m wondering how I got past the premise! Anyway, I thought the movie was okay. Not great, but definitely not one of the 100 worst.

Anaconda: Jon Voight is so crazy and Jennifer Lopez is so hot that you just have to go with it. Throw in Ice Cube, Eric Stoltz, Jonathon Hyde, Owen Wilson, Danny Trejo and one big computerized snake and you’re in for 89 minutes of fun.