“Black Crab” (2022) / Z-View

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Black Crab (2022)

Director: Adam Berg

Screenplay:  Adam Berg, Pelle Rådström  based on the novel by Jerker Virdborg

Starring:  Noomi Rapace and Jakob Oftebro

Tagline: Hope Burns Brightest in The Cold

The Overview:  Beware of Spoilers…

In a world at war, Caroline Edh (Rapace) is one of six soldiers selected for a secret mission.  The team is to skate across frozen waters where the ice is too thin for vehicles (and often people) to deliver a mysterious package to an island research base.  If Edh survives the mission she has been told she will be reunited with her missing daughter.

Black Crab has an interesting plot and the set-up looks like we’re in for a good (maybe even very good) movie.  I kept thinking, “This film is about to take off.”  We’d get cool scenes like retrieving the backpack from the woman under the ice or all the bodies frozen in the ice, but between the cool scenes were lots of shots of soldiers skating or hiding from a helicopter that could almost find them.  Bah!  The movie’s tagline is Hope Burns Brightest in the Cold.  My hope that the movie would get better was left out in the cold.

Black Crab rates 2 of 5 stars.

“Guillermo Del Toro’s Cabinet of Curiosities” Trailer is Here!

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Guillermo Del Toro’s Cabinet of Curiosities trailer is here and it looks good!

The maestro of horror – Guillermo Del Toro – presents 8 blood-curdling tales of horror. This anthology of sinister stories is told by some of today’s most revered horror creators, including the directors of The Babadook, Splice, Mandy, and many more.

CAST: Andrew Lincoln, Ben Barnes, Charlyne Yi, Crispin Glover, Eric Andre, Essie Davis, Kate Micucci, Ismael Cruz Cordova, Rupert Grint, Sofia Boutella

Mike Flannigan’s “The Midnight Club” Teaser is Here!

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Normally, The Midnight Club wouldn’t be high on my list, but Mike “Midnight Mass” Flannigan is behind this!

To those after.
To us now.
And to those beyond.
Seen or unseen.
Here but not here.

At a manor with a mysterious history, the 8 members of the Midnight Club meet each night at midnight to tell sinister stories – and to look for signs of the supernatural from the beyond. Based on the beloved Christopher Pike book series, and brought to life by the creators of The Haunting of Hill House.

“The Predator” (2018) / Z-View

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The Predator (2018)

Director:  Shane Black

Screenplay:  Fred Dekker, Shane Black based on characters created by Jim Thomas, John Thomas

Starring: Boyd Holbrook, Trevante Rhodes, Jacob Tremblay, Keegan-Michael Key, Olivia Munn, Sterling K. Brown, Thomas Jane, Alfie Allen, Jake Busey and Yvonne Strahovski

Tagline:   You’ll never see him coming.

The Overview:  Beware of Spoilers…

While on a rescue mission, Quint McKenna (Holbrook) and his team are attacked by a Predator.  Against all odds, McKenna escapes with his life as well as a Predator faceplate and armor.  McKenna is sure no one will believe his story about an alien encounter so he mails the Predator gear to himself.  McKenna’s plan is to get home and collect the package before his estranged wife, Emily ( Strahovski) gets to it.

McKenna’s plan is foiled when he is picked up for debriefing.  Meanwhile at home, McKenna’s son opens the package and accidentally triggers the alien technology.  At his debriefing McKenna tells about his team’s encounter with the Predator. He is then placed in a group of soldiers with mental issues.  Meanwhile in another part of the facility, a sedated Predator is being prepped for examination.  The Predator wakes up, breaks it’s bonds and kills anyone in it’s way as it escapes.

McKenna is telling the other soldiers about his run-in with the Predator and they’re all laughing at the “real” nut among them… until they see the Predator jumping out of a lab window.  McKenna and the crazy soldiers take-over a bus and give chase.  The Predator escapes and McKenna realizes it is after the armor he mailed to himself.  McKenna and the “loonie” soldiers are the kid’s only chance for survival.

Man, I really had high expectations for The Predator.  Shane Black as the director and co-writer of the screenplay!  It had a good cast (Boyd Holbrook, Sterling K. Brown and Thomas Jane to name three).  What could go wrong?

The Predator starts out okay.  But as the movie rolls along it comes off the rails.

  • We get bad joke after bad joke.
  • The Predator gets into a van and kills a soldier in the back.  When the driver asks his partner if he’s okay, the Predator picks up the man’s severed arm which is in a “thumbs up” position and shows it to the driver.
  • There are Predator dogs with dreadlocks… that play fetch.
  • Two of the “loonie” soldiers get impaled across from each other.  Despite mortal injuries and great pain, they shoot each other in the head to end the other’s misery.
  • We learn that the Predators keep coming back to earth because of climate change and they will thrive as we die off.  What?
  • We learn that McKenna’s autistic son is seen as the next stage of human evolution.
  • We see our heroes jump on the surface of a Predator space ship and those who don’t get cut in half by the ship’s force field will have the chance to bring the ship down by jumping into one of it’s turbines?!
  • Oh, and there’s good Predators and bad Predators… and some are really BIG.

What a mess.  The Predator rates 2 of 5 stars.

“Fatty’s Plucky Pup” (1915) / Z-View

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Fatty’s Plucky Pup (1915)

Director:  Roscoe ‘Fatty’ Arbuckle

Screenplay:

Starring:  Roscoe ‘Fatty’ Arbuckle

Tagline:  None

The Overview:  Beware of Spoilers…

Fatty’s girlfriend is kidnapped and it’s up to Fatty, his dog and the Keystone Cops to save her.  Thank goodness for the dog!

Fatty’s best moments: when he slowly realizes he’s set his bed on fire (and how he deals with it), hanging up his mother’s clean wash, dealing with dog catchers and getting revenge on amusement park con men.  There’s a lot of other stuff in between, but once it comes down to saving his girlfriend, Fatty’s dog becomes the star!

Fatty’s Plucky Pup rates 3 of 5 stars.

Movie Snacks – National Survey Results!

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Fandango, the nation’s largest ticketing service surveyed 2,500 film goers across the U.S. about movie concession snacks.  Above we see a summary of the results.

  • 83% said that movie theater popcorn tastes better than popcorn made at home.  (100% agree.)
  • 53% says nachos are the best hot snack, but 77% avoid messy snacks when on a date.  (I agree with the 53% and pity the 77%  – of course I’m married, so she expects me to be messy).
  • 47% buy concessions even if they are late to a movie.  (If I’m late, I don’t go.  There will be other showings.  And to that 47% – shame on you for disrupting the movie for others!)
  • 48% like to mix candy in their popcorn.  (Genius! I’ve eaten popcorn and candy at the same time, but never mixed the candy into the popcorn!  Genius, I say again!)

Survey: Top Five Candies Mixed into Popcorn

Zablo’s Choices

1. M&Ms / Peanut M&Ms

1. M&Ms / Peanut M&Ms

2. Reese’s Pieces

2. Reese’s Pieces

3. Rasinets

 3. Goobers

4. Goobers

 4. Rasinets

5. Milk Duds

 5. I do not want Milk Duds in my popcorn!

Source:  /Film.

“Fatty’s New Role” (1915) / Z-View

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Fatty’s New Role (1915)

Director:  Roscoe ‘Fatty’ Arbuckle

Screenplay:

Starring:  Roscoe ‘Fatty’ Arbuckle

Tagline:  None

The Overview:  Beware of Spoilers…

Fatty (Arbuckle) is a hobo who gets thrown out of a bar for trying to mooch some hooch.  Some of the regulars at the bar decide to play a joke on the bar’s owner and they convince him that Fatty is a mad bomber who will be back to blow up the bar.  What sounds like a potentially great set-up falls short of greatness.

Fatty’s New Role rates 2 of 5 stars.

RIP: Ken Kelly

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Ken Kelly died yesterday at the age of 76.  No cause of death was reported.

After serving four years in the marines, Ken Kelly decided on a career in art.  He studied under his uncle, the legendary artist Frank Frazetta.  Ken Kelly’s first professional assignment was for Warren’s Vampirella magazine.  That assignment led to Mr. Kelly becoming one of Warren’s most popular and used artists.  Soon other magazine and book publishers were seeking out Ken Kelly to produce covers for them.  His art was especially suited to science fiction, horror and heroic fantasy.

Then in 1975, Mr.. Kelly was commissioned to create the cover for Kiss’ Destroyer album.  The popularity of the Destroyer cover opened up new opportunities.  Soon Ken Kelly’s art was in demand for more album covers, games, calendars, book & magazine covers and books solely dedicated to his art.

I’ve always enjoyed Ken Kelly’s artwork.  My favorites were his barbarian paintings. He made warriors that didn’t look like they’d just come out of the gym, but had instead spent time on the battlefield.

Our thoughts and prayers go out to Ken Kelly’s family, friends and fans.

“Fatty’s Chance Acquaintance” (1915) / Z-View

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Fatty’s Chance Acquaintance (1915)

Director:  Roscoe ‘Fatty’ Arbuckle

Screenplay:  Mack Sennet

Starring:  Roscoe ‘Fatty’ Arbuckle

Tagline:  None

The Overview:  Beware of Spoilers…

Fatty (Arbuckle) and his wife meet another couple while walking in the park.  They strike up a conversation not realizing that the man they just met is a thief… until he steals Fatty’s wife’s purse!  Then it is the usual hijinks with the thief on the run from a cop and Fatty using his cane to get at the other woman’s purse.

I’m a Roscoe “Fatty” Arbuckle fan.  Fatty Chance Acquaintance earns 4 of 5 stars.

RIP: Isidoro Raponi

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It is just being reported that Isidoro Raponi died on May 27, 2022, from congestive heart failure.  Mr. Raponi was 76 years old.

While Isidoro Raponi’s name may not be familiar, his movie work surely is.  Mr. Raponi was a mechanical effects expert for movies.  In addition to helping design, build and operate E.T. for Steven Spielberg’s blockbuster, E.T. The Extra-Terrestrial, Mr. Raponi’s effects could be seen in King Kong (76), Close Encounters of the Third Kind, The Running Man and The Godfather Part III to name a few of the movies he worked on.

Our thoughts and prayers go out to Isidoro Raponi’s family, friends and fans.

George Perez and Svengoolie – The Fan Connection!

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The photo above is of George Perez (in the middle), George’s wife Carol, and Svengoolie.  If you don’t know who George Perez is, either do a search on my site or Google him.  I’ll wait.

Ok, now that we’re on the same page with the late George Perez, one of the most popular artists to ever draw a comic, let’s talk Svengoolie.

Svengoolie is a host of horror movies.  He’s been doing this gig for over 40 years.  For the last decade or so, Svengoolie’s show has been on Me-TV every Saturday at 8pm.  It’s a weekly ritual for many horror movie fans who Tweet along.

As it turns out, George Perez was a Svengoolie fan, and Svengoolie was a George Perez fan! George and/or his art had appeared on Svengoolie’s shows.  When George passed, Svengoolie paid tribute on his next episode.  Which brings us to the art below.  Svengoolie says George…

… once asked me about who some of my favorite superheroes were — and surprised me by sending a fantastic book about his artwork — in which he had actually drawn, on the inside cover, Batman and Captain America discovering a familiar artifact of our set! It is a cherished reminder tome of a friend who was not only a great artist, but a really good and generous man.

Svengoolie shared this in his latest newsletter.  You can learn about Svengoolie, his upcoming shows and more here.

“Old” (2021) / Z-View

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Old (2021)

Director:  M. Night Shyamalan

Screenplay:  M. Night Shyamalan based on the graphic novel Sandcastle by Pierre Oscar Levy and Frederik Peeters

Starring:  Gael García Bernal, Vicky Krieps, Rufus Sewell, Ken Leung, Aaron Pierre and M. Night Shyamalan

Tagline: It’s only a matter of time.

The Overview:  Beware of Spoilers…

Guy and Prisca Cappa along with their young children, Maddox and Trenton arrive at a luxurious remote island resort.  The next morning the resort manager invites the Capra family to join a select few on a trip to a secluded part of the beach off limits to the general population.  Joining them are Charles, his young wife, their daughter along with Charles’ elderly mother and  another married couple, Jarin and Patricia Carmichael.

The secluded area is surrounded by high rock formations. They are driven to a path that will take them to the beach.  Once on the beach they are surprised that a famous rapper, “Mid-Size Sedan”, is there.  They are shocked to see his girlfriend lying dead in the sand!  There is no cell service so the group is unable to contact the resort. Anyone trying to walk back to the road suffers painful headaches and loses consciousness.  As the group argues about what to do, they notice that the children are suddenly looking much older.  Somehow the beach is aging everyone one year for every thirty minutes!

As the group struggles with the reality of their situation one of them begins to have psychotic episodes endangering everyone.  Will they figure a way off the beach?  Will anyone survive?  Only time will tell.

Old works because of M. Knight Shyamalan’s talents behind the camera.  The story is interesting, but would probably have worked better as a thirty minute episode of The Twilight Zone.  My nit to pick with Old is that it becomes redundant, and although the characters’ bodies age, they should remain at their original age mentally.  This makes some of what happens gross (and I’m not talking about the brittle bones lady).  I do give credit for the explanation of how the characters were chosen for the secluded beach.

Old isn’t a great film or one of M. Night Shyamalan’s best but still rates 3 of 5 stars.