Category: Humor

Tales of MegaCon 2012: Mitch vs BIG ANGRY RUSSIAN GUY

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Yesterday, I promised a  MegaCon 2012 story about John “Hex” Carter. So, on the off-chance that’s why you’re back, here it is.

Hex was set up at MegaCon 2012 three tables south of John Beatty and I.  As you can see from the photo, Hex is a big guy.  When in character, as he was for MegaCon, Hex speaks in a deep, booming Russian voice.  Imagine a mean, angry Cossack’s thunderous voice and then think a little scarier.

The other guy in the photo is Mitch Hyman.  Mitch is a funny guy. If he heard me say that, Mitch would say something like, “Yeah, but looks aren’t everything.”  Mitch is a much smaller guy than Hex.  Oh, and Mitch had never met or even seen Hex before.

So it’s early on Saturday and Mitch is telling Beatty and I one of his many humorous stories when Mitch says something about his Russian grandma’s beard — and follows that up with something to the effect of, “You know all Russian women have beards.”

I say, “Hey Mitch!  You better be careful what you say about Russian women and beards.”

Mitch questions a look at me and says, “Yeah?  Why’s that?”

Perfect, he’s given me my in.  “Because if the BIG RUSSIAN GUY hears you, he might take offense.”

Mitch cracks a smile, thinking I’m joking and replies, “Let him take offense.  I’ll kick his *** if he doesn’t like it.”

“Really?”

Mitch replies, “Really” and looks at me like it’s my move.

So while returning Mitch’s stare, I yell: “Hey BIG RUSSIAN GUY!”

On cue, Hex rises to his full height, raises his arms in the air and yells in that booming, scary Cossack voice: “Vhat?”

The look on Mitch’s face is priceless.  There is no way that Mitch  believed that there was a Russian around, much less a BIG RUSSIAN GUY who might be angry about his comment.  Mitch immediately says to me, “Don’t get me in trouble with this guy.”

Ignoring Mitch, I instead point to him and yell to the BIG RUSSIAN: “This guy says that all Russians are…”

Mitch quietly says to me, “Zablo, don’t get my butt kicked.”

I continue: “...SISSIES!”

With that Hex, in character roars: “RUSSIANS are not SISSIES!” and he begins stomping down to our table.  Mitch goes paler, if you can believe that.  Hex stomps down to the table.  For a split  second Mitch stands frozen in his spot staring up at the huge angry Russian. Then we all have a good laugh and I get them to pose for photos.

Mike Torrance Presents “The Night the Reindeer Died 2”

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Mike Torrance aka The Krayola Kidd returns with a clever over-sized card that he gifted me. I can compliment Mike enough on the creativity that went into making it, Everything from the fonts to the cast to the fact that it’s “The Night the Reindeer Died 2” emphasis on the 2. I totally love it and can’t thank Mike enough.

You can see more of Mike’s art at The Daily Sketch with The Krayola Kidd and his Deviant Art site. Mike is available for commissions and his prices are very reasonable. Tell him Sly Santa sent ya!


Ryan Cody Tries on Rhinestone

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This his week Ryan Cody is back with Sly from Rhinestone.

Ryan is still running an unbelievable sale [where you get a free sketch with every purchase. That’s right. Buy Volume 1 of his sketchbook for five bucks and get a free sketch. Same if you buy Volume 2 or the Icarus Convention Issue].

If you want to see more of his art then check out Ryan’s blog and his DA site.

Thanks to Ryan! – Craig

Give Thanks and “You’re Welcome”

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Today is Thanksgiving and many of us will come together with family and friends to pause and give thanks for what we have and perhaps what we’ve been spared.  Charles Dickens may have said it best…

  • “Reflect upon your present blessings, of which every man has many–not on your past misfortunes, of which all men have some.”

Of course not everyone gives thanks.  The Sexy Pilgrim doesn’t. Instead he says, “You’re welcome.”

I hope that you and yours have one of the best Thanksgiving Days ever. Count your blessings, eat too much turkey, ignore that family member who irritates you, make big plans, eat too much pie, doze in front of the tube, have a bit more turkey, and remember to watch a bit of the parade and some football!

Mail Order Mysteries Revealed

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When I was a kid I was always intrigued by the mail order items available in comic books.  Who didn’t think about ordering the X-Ray Specs, the footlocker full of soldiers, or the Ventrillo Voice-Thrower?  After seeing this trailer for Mail-Order Mysteries Revealed, I’m glad that I didn’t… although the lifesize submarine might have been fun… for the 30 minutes or so until it fell apart.

Hey Moe! Moe 3 Stooges Are Coming!

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I’m a fan of The Three Stooges.  [And since you’ve asked my favorites are Curly, Shemp, Moe and Larry, in that order.]  On April 4, 2012, the Farrelly brothers‘ movie which takes the Three Stooges characters into new adventures opens.

While it’s an interesting idea, I wonder if it’ll work.  Do I hope it’s a success?  Why, certainly.  Nyuck, nyuck, nyuck.